Benpaws

http://doyourememberlove.com/musiconlymovie.html

I was browsing through poetry sites today trying to find something FITTING for the start of another year. I found this beautiful video which I think will bring tears but touch hearts in this forum.
Dogs do teach us all about " LOVE" and when they leave us, we are forever changed and much better human beings for having shared our lives with these beloved pets, our very best friends.

I want to wish you all a New Beginning, happier days, less sadness and more joy in your hearts. Sometimes it is "in the valleys" where we grow the most.

My prayers go out to each and every one of my friends here and to Ted for giving us a place of safety where we can share without being ridiculed.

Happy 2009 EVERYONE!

In Friendship,
Joanne (Benpaws)

Toni DiGiallonardo

Joanne
What a great video the tears wouldn't stop. You always share the best stuff with all of us. Thank you for being you! You touch my heart and I'm always amazed at your response to people. I hope Benny is doing good. God Bless!

Toni & Rusty

Raymond

Thanks Joanne. Very touching tribute. The other videos were also special.

Benpaws

Thanks to all of you here. I don't know what I would do if I didn't have this place to come to and find comfort and solace at the darkest time of my life.
Everyone says the "right" things and I, no better, than anyone else. After all we are all "dog lovers" and that makes us a very unique brand of people.

My heart aches for everyone and yet there is hope for many of these precious dogs.

I was praying for some kind of miracle with Benny, but his tumours are growing and our vet does not recommend anything more.

Those big brown eyes are getting to me every day and I have cried an ocean.

Hugs to everyone.

Joanne & Benny

Raymond

Hi there Joanne & Benny,

I'm so sorry to hear what the vet had to say. We've been down this path before and must prepare ourselves- whatever the hell that means. How does one prepare for unspeakable grief, sorrow and that horrible empty heart feeling? I guess I'm a little ticked at still crying almost every day when I think about Larry. I can't stand it that he's not here. You've been thru this before and know. It's my first time losing a 'soul dog'.

Pick up and hold on to your dear Benny boy. Hold him close, look into his big brown eyes, snuggle him like crazy, tickle him if he's ticklish, and tell him how much you love him. I know you do these things. And then let Benny know it is OK to go (I can hardly type this....)

Have someone take pictures of those moments. Those type pictures mean the world to me now that my boy is gone.

I wish I could provide the kind of depth of support and understanding you so unselfishly share on this forum and in emails.

May God give you peace.

Benpaws

My Dear Raymond,
You do provide me with more than you know. Your "journals" on Larry I continue to re-read. The way in which you said your final goodbyes to Larry and dug that hole where his little body would be placed along with his favourite funny collar that he wore at Christmas and his blanket and toy and then your absolutely awesome VIDEO were all amazing. I certainly don't do or say anything more than everyone who posts in this forum. I just say what is in my hurting heart.
The problem with Benny is he resists "hugs" and so I "blow him kisses" and he does allow me to pat him on his way out get another drink of water. He has always been a very independent little guy and that is something we do love about him. I do wish he was cuddlier, but he sure has a big piece of my heart. When children want to maul him or lie on him etc., he lets them do whatever and many days little girls come to the door just to see how Benny is doing. He LOVES it.
Our time will come to say goodbye. I don't know when, I don't know how long we have together, but you and everyone else who has gone through the loss of your best friend or is going through what I am now gives me the strength to know that I will do the right thing when the time comes. I will also be able to come back here and share my story and read others and show comfort.
Don't worry about crying. That is a very real and basic need we have when we lose someone so irreplaceable. The pain is more intense when the tears won't come.
Thank you and everyone here for helping me during these sad days.

In Friendship,
Joanne & Benny

Toni DiGiallonardo

Joanne
I just want you and Benny to know you are in my prayers and my heart hurts for you and everyone that visits this forum. This is so hard to deal with. Rusty is getting more tumors and his mouth is kinda bleeding again, but he is happy which makes me (I don't know what it makes me). God Bless!

Toni & Rusty

Benpaws

My Dear Toni,
Sorry to hear about Rusty's tumours in his mouth and I know how you are feeling....kinda "numb." Thank you for your caring words to me and so many others when you yourself are in distress.
I am sure Rusty, like Benny and all the other doggies suffering from this terrible disease doesn't complain but just enjoys being with you. Too bad some humans cannot be like dogs when they are ill.
I continue my prayers for you and Rusty and everyone here and their puppies. Just love Rusty with all that you have for as long as you have and keep hoping and before you know it another day, another walk, another pat on the head will happen.
God Bless you and Rusty today.Today is all any of us have and we should also learn to live in the moment and put our fears aside. Easier said than done. I know.

Hugs,
Joanne & Benny

Toni DiGiallonardo

Joanne
I want to tell you what happened when I had to put my long hair dachsund Red to sleep. It was so fast he was here one day and the next day he was on his death bed. He had a tumor on his pancreas. The day after his death I was sitting on the couch loving Rusty crying my eyes out. I looked out the window and there was a women walking a long haired dachsund down our road. I had never seen that kind of dog in my neighborhood ever, I have lived her for 18 years this was maybe six years ago. I ran outside just to look at the dog and talk to the lady, they were gone vanished into thin air. I know God let me see my Red one more time. I know an angel was taking him for his last walk on this earth. God knew that I had not prepared myself for Red's death and I got to see him one more time. God is so wonderful. I really don't know what is worse watching Rusty never knowing if today is the day or boom your baby is gone. I just wanted to share this with you. I pray you and Benny are having a good day. God Bless!

Toni & Rusty

Benpaws

My Dear Toni,
What a lovely story. The tears are streaming down my face. Yes, God was allowing you one more look at your beloved "Red" and letting you know that he was once again healthy and well and safe in the "arms of God." I do believe in these things too.Our little Willie went quickly too. He was out for his evening walk and doing well and came in, went downstairs and hid under a desk all night. The next morning he had renal failure and was put to sleep. I wonder if it is easier when they go quickly or is it good to have this extra time with them knowing that they are ill?
In 1986 my father and mother were visiting with us for Easter Sunday. It was March 31st and mother had been unwell with a stroke but was feeling well enough to come and have Easter dinner with us and celebrate our middle son Matthew's 11th birthday. Matt had been born on Easter Sunday in 1975.
On Good Friday I woke up having had a dream that dad passed away while cutting the lawn. He was always the first to cut his lawn in the Spring but we still had snow that year. I called Dad at 6:30 and he answered and said he was just fine and it was "only a dream." In the dream there was a brilliant white light and dad disappeared into it telling me that everything would be okay and to look after mom because she would need me.
Well we had a wonderful time that Easter Sunday and I always put something special at the place settings and that year I was drawn to making a cross stitch bookmark for dad's Bible which said "Lord Light My Way." The next day my husband and I and our 3 sons went out and it was a beautiful sunny afternoon. When we returned Jim went into the backyard to toss a ball with the kids and the phone rang. I answered it. My father had been out cutting his lawn and had suffered a massive heart attack and died. I was NUMB!
We buried dad from my childhood home (the funeral home) and with tears streaming down my face I placed the bookmark which had been put into dad's Bible in dad's hands and kissed his brow and said goodbye for the final time.
We did look after mother for another 13 years and two days following dad's burial she suffered another massive stroke and was unable to speak. I know God was talking to me in that "dream."
Dad took his place among the "angels" and I know he is watching over me every day. He is with our two schnauzers Wolfgang and Willie and my childhood poodle Perky. I know he will be waiting for Benny and Benny will be safe in the "arms of God" just as your little Red is.
I have been thinking about dad as I always do this time of the year which is approaching the anniversary of his death. He was a big, strong and loving man and hardly ever had a cold. I guess God needed him more than I did.
Thank you for sharing your story with me. Give Rusty a big hug and have a good day together. My best friend has a little terrier and his name is Rusty too. He is Benny's best friend and Rusty will miss Benny.

Hugs,Joanne